Bombed Morning and Despondent Hopes

The night was restless, he could not sleep. It had been this way for sometime now, in and out of perspicacity, living his hazy dreams in semi-conscious purple and blue drops, afraid to snap to reality to face his loneliness. He knew the day was approaching and that put him at ease. Atlast! He had planned it just two weeks before and because of lack of time, he decided to execute it in the morning itself. He could see it all. The huge moving masses, the snake-like chain of targets coming to a halt at the exact time he had planned, the movement of the laptop, the blaring sound of the horn, the lean thump, then the sudden surge forward, the inertia pushing him backward, people's face twisting, eyes with dreams unfulfilled blinking awkwardly at the sudden sound, the stench of human bodies around, and then nothing. He would be travelling home, to his dreams, to peace, and to her. She would be waiting for him with upturned curved lips that would kiss him on the forehead till his heartbeat reduces from thumping hard and put an end to his loneliness. Her open arms will be waiting to hold him and put him to rest. He would be travelling to where his heart belonged.

With these thoughts running his mind, sleep did not come easy. The added weight of the plan ahead and that it is early in the morning made him queasy. Others in his clan on a mission like this usually chose to execute it in the evening or night when people were relaxed, returning back home. That would be the ideal time to make the move. He fiddled the TV remote on and off, trying to think of something different. She was everywhere - playing football for liverpool in ESPN, fighting against the martians in star movies, singing in a music channel. Her thoughts made him look forward to the morning which will take him closer to her. Love filled his heart and without her by the side, he did not know where to direct it. The claws of loneliness gripped him in the dark echelons of the cold night and he hated it. He wanted sunshine, he wanted the light, he wanted the horn, he wanted her breath on him, he wanted to sleep in peace under her care. Yet, there he was unable to put her off his mind, every minute craving for her presence.

He knew he had to wake up early, an unusual practice. The plan was early in the morning and he knew then a lot of people would be missing their day. They were all sleeping in peace, looking forward to the morning like him, only that they do not know why he is going to do what he is about to do. He knew he would not make up his mind in the sleepy wakings, so he set the device on before he went to sleep. As he was doing it, he realized how little time he had ahead. He double checked the device, yes, 5 AM, yes again, 5 AM. That would be the time he expected the device to set itself off into mild beeps first and then stronger ones. He hoped he would wake up to live the moment. To realize atlast that the time he had waited for has come. After seeing the signal blinking on the device, he pushed himself to sleep.

He woke up at 6.30 AM and realized the alarm he had set in his mobile did not wake him up. The morning train to his hometown which he had booked two weeks earlier was just leaving the station and he has missed it!